There Really Was Nothing

As I mentioned  MX got married this past weekend when I was in the same city on that day for a friends wedding.

I waited and waited to feel something. Anything.

But it never came. I was indifferent.

I lunched with a friend, the wife of MX's oldest friend. I learned her husband had made a point of telling MX we'd be lunching that day. The evil part of me loved that just a bit. I learned they would be attending the wedding. And I was grateful.

Grateful because I do not want to harm their relationship with him. I know they do not agree with his actions but they were friends before and I'd like them to remain that way. They are the kind of people he needs in his life, whether he knows it or not, because they are good people.

The wedding I attended. The bride had been a reception host in my wedding. One of her bridesmaids had been one of mine. Another bridesmaid and both her personal attendants had roles in my wedding. While they were taking pictures at a foutain they ran into none other than MX and wedding party 2.0. They made a point of yelling hello and watching him squirm.

And for that I may have smiled another wicked smile.

There were no tears. No feelings of sadness.

That isn't my life anymore. He has his life 2.0.

As do I.

And the only place I want to be is right here, right now.